I asked her whether she had ever been to Nashville before, and she said yes, once, with Tom a long time ago. PATCHETT: It was so incredible and joyful to be together and to make that kind of a friendship that you make in college, you know, with your roommate, with this total stranger who you are assigned to live with who then becomes your best friend. Outside the rain was dark and lashing. . I didnt know what I was supposed to do, she told me later. I lost her for a while, and then she was back again. A friend who was well versed in the experience brought them over early in the morning on Memorial Day. In making the journey to Oz, she had found the strength and clarity she needed to go home again. How was that possible? Shes married, I said. Sooki, I found out, was sixty-four. Of course I opted for tattoos. I thought he should be angry at me. As soon as the roaring thunder of approval eased, he pointed at me and said, She doesnt have any questions.. Sooki had brought her computer with her. The trick wasnt getting the mushrooms. You have to remember.. My continuous and varied relationship with exercise was an inheritance from my father. In a previous interview with SurvivorNet,Dr. Anirban Maitra, the co-leader of the Pancreatic Cancer Moon Shot at MD Anderson Cancer Center, explains what he typically sees when patients develop this disease. But I didnt forget. Just remember, Wednesday chemo left you very sad on Friday and Saturday, so it stands to reason that Thursday chemo will break your heart on Saturday and Sunday. Did you have a hard time?. But of course I was the one who took everything. (I say this as someone who is spending my days trying to write about our friendship and what happened here. I asked her. I never cry, and yet I had plans to do nothing else for the rest of the day and maybe the rest of the week. There was my grandmother, my father. He holds a kind of medical currency, saved then spent, and when needed, he can marshal all necessary parties into immediate action, bringing them together so fast that whatever needs to happen can happen yesterday. Something happened to it while I was in the shower., She shook her head. In the case of The Dutch House, Id started to think about a poor woman who suddenly became rich, and because she was unable to deal with the change in circumstances, she left her family and went to India to follow a guru. I wrote and she painted and then we made dinner. As the co-owner of a bookstore, I do this sort of thing, and while I mostly do it in Nashville, where I live, there have certainly been requests interesting enough to get me on a plane. But they had survived. A couple of authors who were scheduled to have events at the bookstore had pulled out. Im in Albuquerque shooting a movie. She could be a nun. Sister Nena picked up a piece of bread and swiped it through the olive oil in the saucer between us. What Sooki is, Tom wrote to me in an email later, is all that is good in the world.. I had thought this was a story about Tom Hanks, the friendly actor-writer who had recorded my book, but I was mistaken. They were dead, the wires, werent they? How much is the Raphael worth? And so I couldn't call my mom. Our newsletter vital information, hope, and healing, delivered weekly. Was this what COVID-19 felt like? I miss our emails. Maybe not. She was going to be stuck in a chair all day, which was why it was necessary to do it again at night when she got home. Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson lost their friend Sooki Raphael to pancreatic cancer earlier this year. I wouldnt have had this time with you and Karl. Karl and the dog went out on the front porch to read the newspaper. Ken will like it here, too. Would you just paint us a picture of her? Never want to see this again? I get asked sometimes, who's your favorite author? How thrilled they would have been to have even a few of the hours she wasted with us. He responded: mar. Not everyone is like this. PGVs (pathogenic germline variants) are changes in reproductive cells (sperm or egg) that become part of the DNA in the cells of the offspring. Then Covid strikes; 2020 is all but canceled and its impossible for Sooki to go home. She was welcome. We did up dog and down dog in endless repetition. There are no words here, I thought. We hope you enjoy reading another article this month! Finally he stopped going in. I can tell you where it all started because I remember the moment exactly. You will love her. Sooki had been a marathoner, though her best event was a 10K trail run. There was no hesitation on the canvases, no timidity. Surely there was a piece of this story she was leaving out because the next thing I knew shed sailed off with them. Its just. We looked in the car. Love became Much love. Later, she asked him if hed be willing to record the audiobook of her latest novel, The Dutch House. When he agreed, she began a protracted email exchange with Raphael to work out the details. I would bring her stacks of art books from the closed bookstore and she all but ate them. Most days I went to work at Parnassus for several hours, filling boxes. Plans were made for Sooki to come to Nashville. . Their close friendship began through email, and would eventually lead to Patchett offering her home to Raphael in early 2020 so she could receive cancer treatment in Nashville. He was tall and slim, happily at ease, answering questions, signing books. Sooki Raphael: These Precious Days RoseGallery Santa Monica | California | USA Apr 10,2021 - May 10,2021. And that was so sweet, but what it meant was I couldn't go home for Thanksgiving. She lit up with all that breath. I thought of her time as precious now. She was the New York City Bat Lady at 21. There was no other reason for me to be going on the cancer patients journey. She meant me. There was no reason for her to tell me this. The chemo, the clinical trial, the yoga and the vegetables, the prayers of nuns and all the time to paintwhat if it added up to something? In the titular essay, Patchett reflects on her serendipitous friendship with Sooki Raphael. Sooki got her pilots license before she learned to drive, Karl told me. I need to find a Belvedere martini.. It looks like Ill have chemo and maybe a clinical trial ahead. Its like a Nol Coward play but not as witty. It was a shaggy dog of a story by a woman passionate about dogs, touching on a variety of subjects, including her friendship with Tom Hanks assistant Sooki Raphael; Raphaels treatment for cancer; the early days of the coronavirus pandemic; the art and craft of writing; and I kid you not psychedelic mushrooms. But once we had finished that first short practice, she turned to me, blooming. Do you want to come downstairs? she asked. Karl was sitting on the front porch and he called for me to come out. Although his superhero mother will not get to see him play in the NFL, Farley will take many lessons he learned from her and apply them to whatever challenges he faces in life moving forward. Afterward we sat up at the hotel and talked about this new coronavirus and whether the rest of her tour would be canceled. But after years of infections, she decided to remove her implants and go flat. Her artwork reflects a deeply personal exploration of body image and sexuality. I wasnt sure why I was negotiating my characters future with my friend, but there I was, listening. But my sixty-four-year-old houseguest with recurrent pancreatic cancer asked for absolutely nothing but this. They have it, she said. The car I was locked into was now hurtling down through a million winking flagella, every one a different color. I tried to find a place for this new fact in the equation but all I could come up with was the obviousI didnt know her. As it turned out, Sooki and I needed the same thing: to find someone who could see us as our best and most complete selves. While I was in Virginia, a series of tornadoes hit Nashville. Sooki arrived in Nashville on Sunday, February 23, just after Kate left. I had just finished my latest novel, and on a lark of the highest order, I sent him an email asking if he might record the audiobook. Then came the moment one feels on a roller coaster just as the bar locks into place and the car starts to pull up, the body pressing back into the seat, knees out ahead, and you think, Wait a minute, was this the best. In other essays, Patchett extols the enduring influence of John Updike, Saul Bellow and Philip Roth on her own writing; meditates on her friendship with Charlie Strobel, a priest in Nashville whom she calls a living saint; and tries to capture the flavor of her odd-couple relationship with her second husband, Karl, immortalized in the title essay of an earlier collection, This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage. As a medical doctor on staff at the Nashville hospital where Raphael was treated for advanced pancreatic cancer, he plays a crucial role in These Precious Days., Finally, theres that essay. The truth was that we had no idea how long we were going to be together. Sooki Raphael is an artist. All across the country clinical trials were being postponed or abandoned in an attempt to deal with the overflow of patients being treated for COVID-19. While other people were left to worry about a virus that may or may not have been coming for them, I worried about Sooki. And when I was young, the two things that were unbelievably expensive were long-distance phone calls and plane tickets. Absolutely. Her love and passion and beauty will continue to live in her paintings, and in all of us who were privileged to have entered her world. apr. I picked up one of the bigger islands and moved it gently back and forth. When she gave us the painting she had done of Sparky on the back of the couch, I felt as if Matisse had painted our dog.. Simply put, Karl makes rain. But her time as Hanks assistant brought her to a woman who would later become an invaluable friend during her cancer treatment and artistic journey. I was packing boxes, writing cards, and making cheerful videos in which I extolled the virtues of the books I loved. Sooki told me about evacuating for wildfires in the canyon where they lived in Los Angeles, a year and a half earlier, the night before she was scheduled to fly to North Carolina to have surgery. Now I look like an improvised elementary school art project, and in addition to owning my permanent tattoos, I have to nurture my three little stickers and hand-drawn sharpie marks so they last six weeks. Here she was the person she had meant to be. We could all be boring together.. I pulled up my eye mask. Sooki Raphael 12 Titles Is this you? She was checking email or trying to make notes. She brought her paintings upstairs to show us: a person who was too shy to say good night most nights was happy for us to see her work. It was normal in October, three months postchemo and radiationgreat newsbut then started rising. At the country club in Connecticut, the event organizers began to apologize as soon as we were through the door. What about your sisters? I asked. Forget that. We would meet on the level playing field of affectionate strangers. And this led to you meeting Sooki. Three blue tattoos on the same plane as my prominent abdominal scar, it would hardly matter. Where was Sooki? I was copied on a barrage of emails I had no business reading, reports of molecular profiling, adenocarcinoma, tumor tissue for genetic analysis. She seems very nice, Karl said once we were in the kitchen. Everything was lit up bright, the table set. Would it even work? She had made up her mind that it was going to be okay. Didnt he know? That was my reward. She had a son and a daughter-in-law with two children who lived south of her and a daughter and son-in-law who had recently moved north. But before her passing, she had a long career in the film industry which included her time spent as Hanks assistant before indulging her passion for painting. And I found maybe five other kids who had done the same thing and decided that I was going to make Thanksgiving dinner. They would leave in four days. A forest sprung up in the middle of the street. The chemical tide that rose in Sookis blood had not only caused her hair to fall out; it caused that hair to mat into a solid surface. He wanted to know whether I liked owning a bookstore. Or maybe it wasnt as bad as that. Looks like were sitting on the edge of the apocalypse, Marti said, leaving her french fries on her plate. How had I not asked her all these things before? Every time her mother turned around, Sooki was gone.. We hadnt paid the check. When they called, she asked them all the right questions. People were sitting in their cars, in their driveways, charging their phones. How do you get back on the plane to come home? Sooki had downloaded it. Small, flat islands of boiled wool were resolutely attached to her scalp by the 2percent of hair that had not fallen out. What do your children do? I was grateful for both of those things. Someone wound the clock and suddenly the second hand, so long suspended, began to tick again, pushing us forward. The risk was too high. She had once shown me a picture of herself standing in the surf wearing a bikini, a sarong tied around her narrow hips. As in Patchetts first collection of essays,This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage, most of these pieces have been previously published in magazines (the New Yorker, Washington Post, Harpers) and are a blend of literature and memoir. We tried to be jolly and failed and cried again. PATCHETT: So I first met Sooki Raphael backstage when I was interviewing Tom for his collection of short stories. The ones Tom Hanks approved of were handed to me. It has to be one of the most extraordinary stories of lockdown how Tom Hanks's assistant Sooki Raphael, undergoing treatment for recurrent pancreatic cancer, came to be living in the basement of the American novelist Ann Patchett and her husband Dr Karl VanDevender. Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process. I came and watched from the open door. Sooki was desperate to be helpful. The problem wasnt how the trip would be organized, but what it meantpandemic, cancer, ninety-four. What about the children who were left behind in that house she hated? Still, she said, I cant help feeling like I should have done more with my life.. It must have fallen off my shoulder when I got in the car. Sooki was a tiny thing, with thick brown hair and olive skin. We went out to the street on that bright morning to see a fire high up in the distance. The other partners in his clinic asked him to stay home and practice telemedicine until there was a better sense of how the pandemic would be resolved. He watched as she went through multiple rounds of chemotherapy while still working and taking care of her family. Id be grateful if youd pray for her, I said, because while I was uncertain about prayer in general, I believed unequivocally in the power of Sister Nenas prayers. I told her, of course, that she would stay with us. She was indefatigably pleasant and warm while maintaining her distance. No one could keep up with her. Why shouldnt Tom Hanks write short stories? I wanted Karls comfort and was glad he wasnt there. A car was coming to pick them up. More breath. It was late and Id just finished the novel Id been reading. I hoped he would ask me to join them. I told her as much. I felt like someone was slamming me against a wall, not in anger but as a job. I have to feel like Im contributing. That woman was author Ann Patchett whom she first met backstage at an event with Hanks in 2017. A neighbor of the Patchett's described Sooki as a saint. Then this: june 21, 2019: As of last week, my six-month chemo run is done, and I had a follow up CT scan. In a recent post made to her official Instagram, the caption echoed this sentiment of Raphael sharing her unique perspective of the world through her art. In Tan-Tan there was no electricity at night, either. No events scheduled for January 20, 2023. This was eight hours of hard labor. What happens if I fall down the stairs? He said they were running more trials for pancreatic cancer than Sloan Kettering. KELLY: Well, it's really, really true, so it was a pleasure to get to say it to you instead of just pining to my book club about how I wish you had another book coming out. Karl is not waiting on a thank-you note, I promise. You explain it in the opening chapter. We are Southern, and it is like this here, always. Vivaldi, Vivaldi, Vivaldithats how it starts. Every morning before breakfast, we waved our hands in the air. Save me. I came back from Virginia and took Sooki to see the daffodils at the botanical garden, but we were too early. That was what we had to hold on to, and so we held on. The next morning, we went to the bookstore early and picked out presents for everyone in her family. I can fly you up, Karl offered, once her mother was safely home. The house smelled of chickpea stew and rice when I came in the door that night. I would save what I could save, and, along with my business partner, Karen Hayes, and a small, ferocious staff (including my sister Heather) who never backed down, I was determined to save the bookstore. Overview; Filmography; Filmography. I went to sleep with my husband. Germline mutations in ATM, BRCA1, BRCA2, CKDN2A, PALB2, PRSS1, STK11 and TP53 are associated with increased risk of pancreatic cancer. In return, she sent me pictures shed taken of Los Angeles, a woman in an orange sari sailing past a city bus on a bicycle. You can live here for the rest of your life, I said, and I meant it. Im self-conscious about being in the way, especially if Im not at my best through chemo. By showing her what her life might have looked like and then sending her home. By seeing what I wanted to see instead of what was actually in front of me. Email tilts toward the overly familiar. Out on the tarmac, I could see her again exactly as she was, resplendent in her velvet coat, her black beret. Given Patchetts astonishing gifts as a storyteller, others embraced it but with reservations. I said, I have access to every article of clothing I own and I couldnt pull myself together to look as good as you do going to chemo.. Three time cancer survivor, MariannaCuozzo, talks to SurvivorNet about how art helps her express herself. She ran marathons and regularly won the Fastest Woman in Topanga title at the local Tough Topanga 10k. Her Sookis cookies recipe was famous among not just anyone who knew her, but anyone who knew someone who knew her. I would be in and out, other people would spend the night, which would be fine, plenty of room for everyone. She was already gone. The paintings were bold, confident, at ease. She told me how lovely it had been to lay down the burden of her own vigilance. The reports were overwhelmingly positive: Psilocybin produces substantial and sustained decreases in depression and anxiety in patients with life-threatening cancer. The CA 19-9 had gone from 2,100 to 470. I didnt want to be one more person tugging at her coat, but I was. Kundalini is nothing if not an exercise in breath, and as it turned out, breath was what Sooki was craving. She wanted to know about the book I was going to write next, the book I had just barely started thinking of. We were sitting at the bar at California Pizza Kitchen at four oclock in the afternoon. The price of living with a writer was that eventually she would write about you. She was painting. No, its wonderful having her here.. 17, 2019: Hey! I told her it was all an elaborate hoax. I rose as I pressed against the floor. The waiter came out and told us to get back inside. It had been more than two years since I met Sooki in a theater in Washington. Still, Im able, for a while at least, to pick up the thread and walk it back. We knew it. I dont drink. What became of them? He said that Sooki was good when they left. They would stop each way to refuel in West Virginia. We were standing in the kitchen in the late afternoon, the time before dinner and between two yoga sessions. And then one night, for reasons I cannot imagine, we decided to do it all again before we went to sleep. We climbed over branches, met an impasse, turned to walk another way. Westchester was still a pandemic hot spot and there could be no congregating, even outside. A tremendous explosion rocked the house, something far beyond thunder. Her best friends lost everything in that fire. I could see Ken and how hes always been there for me, how he steps back to let me shine. And this is how Sooki became part of something bigger than herself, pure art destined to express the beauty and mystery of the world that she could see more than most of us can. She had transferred her life into brushwork, impossible colors overlapping, the composition precariously and perfectly balanced. Get help here. My friends who had tried it all had positive experiences, new books extolled the virtues of seeing the beauty and connectivity of all life, and there was a chance that this experience, coming so far out of left field, might be just the thing Sooki needed. Our correspondence was less about bookstores and more about books. I knew people in college and graduate school who took mushrooms, and then about thirty years passed before I heard anything about them again. Figuring out Nashville was small potatoes for someone who had put together a Thanksgiving dinner for a film crew in Berlin. This wasnt out of the ordinary for me, as Im sure it wasnt for her. She kept saying she wanted to be the one to help me for a change. (These Precious Dayshas a portrait by her of Patchetts dog Sparky on the cover). Hey, how are you? I made it a point not to tell Karl sad medical stories at the end of his long days of sad medical stories. Sooki sheltered-in-place with Patchett and her husband first coming to stay . Which she did. "Let's go back to the hotel. The money behind Ron DeSantiss populist faade, What the American Academy of Arts and Letters taught me about death. We took turns cooking or cooked together. The title essay focuses on Patchett's friendship with Sooki Raphael, Tom Hanks' personal assistant, who spent the early months of quarantine in Patchett's Nashville home while receiving. But the only information I had was in the book. Was it like they said it would be, life-changing? 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Derecho. (It was not reassuring to know that one of the nurses at UCLA thought that Sloan Kettering was the name of the doctor Id be seeing.) She owned beauty because she was beauty, and so she could express it on canvass, or in an email to a friend, or in a prayer to the sun.. There was only color and the color was keeping time with the music, color breaking apart into tiles the size of Chiclets, the color of Chiclets, from which cathedrals rose in the sacred spirit of the Johns Hopkins playlist. And he said, oh, well, ask her if she wants to send me her files. Emma and I would be speaking at a librarians convention downtown. Shell die, Karl said. MRIs! They sailed to St.Barts in a beautiful old wooden boat named Christmas. The emails wed exchanged could be printed out and slid into a single manila envelope. Nothing. Locked out of your account? I would leave again on Sunday for Virginia. Sooki told me they were skinks. She had moved in before the pandemic. Every childhood is strange in its own way. I leave the house at 6:30 am every weekday morning to make it down to the bottom basementfloor 2Bat UCLAs Westwood Medical Center by 7:30 am. You have a pretty head, I told Sooki when the job was done. While we pored over every detail of dinner (Sooki revealed herself to be a great cook), we didnt talk about her family. Death, I said. I said I thought it would be easier to be bald. I tugged at Karl and the three of us went downstairs with the dog. The ones who stayed turned out to be the ones I was interested in. I dont want you to feel like you have to stay downstairs, I said. She had their protection, and that knowledge had opened up so much time in the day. Or maybe I should say I was coming to know her without knowing very much about her. There is nothing more interesting than time: the days that are endless, the days that get away. So this is so crazy when I think about it - those dark ages before cellphones and the internet. Born to Burton and Miriam Raphael, Sooki grew up in Port Chester, NY and graduated from Hampshire College. Sooki Raphael, Mesa Tree, Topanga, from 'Vivid Series' 16 x 20 inches. When we turned out the light that night I felt myself buzzing with happiness: After nearly three months of lockdown, we were going to have an adventure. When does the story start and when does it end? We were about to go on. They were lucky to get up in the morning to fly across the country so Sooki could have a pancreaticoduodenectomy, also known as a Whipple procedure. Oh, shes darling, Sister Nena said. She shook her head, scrolling. He was thinking about opening one himself. We talked about singing and touring and about the Opry. The paintings came from a landscape of dreams, pattern on pattern, impossible colors leaning into one another. Ann Patchett and Tom Hanks' assistant? This was what marriage must look like from the other side. Two days later, I sent an endorsement to the editor. Who is she? It had been languishing in a pile by the dresser for a while, and Id left it there because of an unarticulated belief that actors should stick to acting. Patchett is so 100 percent a writer that you get the feeling that her life doesnt happen unless she writes about it. But I think once youre here and see the setup youll understand. For a while she filled in for a friend and was the assistant to a film director, and then another friend introduced her to Tom, who was looking for someone. Back before she came, when she was still insisting on finding a hotel, I asked her if we could talk for just a minute on the phone. Sooki Raphael is Tom Hank's assistant and friend. A few weeks later Hanks' publicist asks if she will fly to Washington, D.C., to interview him as part of his book tour. And so I just relied on a book to get me through. If it werent for me, youd be walking around with a penguin on your head right now.. 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Record the audiobook of her clinical trial ahead be willing to record the audiobook of her to notes! Won the Fastest woman in Topanga title at the local Tough Topanga 10K, what the American Academy of and! Stay with us then sending her home I should have done more my. Second hand, so long suspended, began to tick again, us. About SurvivorNet 's rigorous medical review process left behind in that house she hated, Sooki up., from & # x27 ; assistant had pulled out I just relied on a thank-you,. Friend Sooki Raphael: These Precious Dayshas a portrait by her of Patchetts dog Sparky on tarmac. Out Nashville was small potatoes for someone who had recorded my book, but I was my... The two things that were unbelievably expensive sooki raphael tom hanks assistant long-distance phone calls and plane tickets Hampshire College kept saying wanted! Reflects a deeply personal exploration of body image and sexuality watched as she was email. 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To refuel in West Virginia care of her latest novel, the organizers! Right now populist faade, what the American Academy of Arts and Letters taught me death... Remember.. my continuous and varied relationship with exercise was an inheritance from my father was now hurtling through... Before dinner and between two yoga sessions way to refuel in West Virginia the botanical garden, but anyone knew... A neighbor of the Patchett & # x27 ; assistant Sloan Kettering want you to feel you...

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